


Four Times Bella Saw Jacob (And One Time She Didn't)

by intermediacy



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-30
Updated: 2016-12-30
Packaged: 2018-09-13 10:59:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9120700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/intermediacy/pseuds/intermediacy
Summary: It's probably the last time he'll see her human, be able to smell the warm scent from her skin; he knows it's one of the last times she'll blush crimson, one of the last times he'll be able to hug her and feel a heartbeat.





	

  
_"I love you as certain dark things are to be loved  
in secret, between shadow and soul."_

Pablo Neruda's Sonnet XVII

_______________________________________________  
_______________________________________________

**001\. Wedding Bells**  
Bella's getting married; it's a big church, full of flowers and ribbons, guests and smiles. It's _'til death do you part_ and hidden winks, curled lips hiding private jokes. It's _I'm yours forever_ and Jacob feels sick, empty, lonesome. He doesn't show it, though. He sits in the back, quietly, watching as Bella walks down the aisle. It's probably the last time he'll see her human, be able to smell the warm scent from her skin; he knows it's one of the last times she'll blush crimson, one of the last times he'll be able to hug her and feel a heartbeat. But he doesn't hug her; he doesn't touch her as he says congratulations at the reception. (More flowers, extravagant center pieces and table settings, a cake that's large enough to feed everyone in Forks and La Push - and then some - and he knows this wasn't Bella's doing. She likes simple, basic.)

He forces a smile, mimicking the one on her face (but that one's real, smothered with kisses from her new husband) and he won't stay long. He's polite to Edward, but icy; there's no point in trying to make friends. Bella's clinging to Edward's hand like it's a life line (her mother and father are around, masking the slight disappointment of _She's only eighteen; this was too soon_ with laughter and happiness.) "Thanks for coming," she says, smiling and he tries to ignore the _I'm sorry, I wish there was another way_ that's hidden in her voice; there is another way, but he knows she's not willing to acknowledge it, to try it out. He wishes her and Edward happiness and a long life together (he ignores the smirk that causes the corner of Edward's lips to twitch with laughter) and leaves.

 

**002\. Second Chances**  
It's years later and she crosses the line, not caring about the treaty. She knows about it, basically signed the dotted line when Alice's teeth sank into her neck, but she doesn't care. She goes to his house (his father's gone now, passed away a month ago - she never made it to the funeral) and he's there. He's bigger, stronger, meaner; she reaches for his hand, touches his skin and burns him with her cold stone fingers. He pulls away, eyes glowering with pain, sadness, anger (but never hate - he couldn't hate her, even when he tried.)

She's all apologies and golden eyes, stinking like the others (but stronger now, the smell more bitter than he'd ever imagined) and he can't take it. He wants to break her, to make her something better, something more like herself. "Jacob," she says, his name like a secret on her lips. He shakes his head, moves away from her and goes to work on his newest car. She stands in the remains of broken hearts and shattered dreams, fighting tears that will never come, wishing for a second chance she'll never get (that she doesn't deserve).

 

**003\. It'll Be Like I Never Existed**  
They run into each other in the woods; she's hunting, he's running, and it surprises her how familiar his scent is. Burned into her brain, her perfect memory, as if she'd always known it. As if it was a life line, there to save her from disappointment, from dead ends, from herself. They stare at each other, golden eyes locked on his (larger than normal in his wolf state) and he growls. It's angry, annoyed, and she wishes for a moment that she could read minds like Edward. 

Primal instincts take over and it's all fangs and claws, stone and fur. Passion and love turns to anger, pain, defense and they're fighting like she'd never imagined they could. The fragile being he remembers so well is as strong (if not stronger) than him, and she fights back to protect herself. It ends with wounds (hers already starting to heal) and ripped clothing, naked bodies and furious kisses. They never got their chance, but under the stars with the greenery around them (the forest is too familiar; she remembers all too well the last time she laid here, broken because of Edward's lies) they get a chance. Fire and ice, good and evil; they're together for a brief moment in her never-ending life.

 

**004\. Run**  
She promises to come back, whispered words cold against his ear; the smell of her breath is sickly sweet, nothing like he remembers. They decide on a time (the place is always the same) and he waits patiently through those weeks until he can feel her cold fingers again. It's a whole new ball game - a new set of memories, a new heartache, a new reason for wanting to run away. But he clings to the idea that maybe, someday, she'll give in to him completely. He knows it's useless (she couldn't, even if she tried) but he hopes.

He waits for days where they always meet - the clearing green and wet and cold. His fur moves in the breeze, his large ears perking up at every faint sound. She never shows. He waits and waits, but when he finally gives up and turns around (tail between his legs, ears against his head, footsteps heavy with heartache) he knows that she'll never show up again. He never returns to the clearing, stays away from it when he runs (which he never does with the other boys now). It's too hard, and he thinks again about leaving La Push for good.

 

**005\. Granite and Porcelain**  
She returns to La Push many moons later after traveling the country, never settling in one place for too long. She stands in the shadows, watching from behind the scenes as they all say their goodbyes to a wolf-man who was taken too soon. (He was 42, and she wonders what it felt like to really be that age.) He'd died of a heart attack (broken heart syndrome, though there was no real reason behind it - he hadn't dated in years). She stayed away from everyone, keeping her distance so they wouldn't recognize her, figure out that she was forever stuck in the eighteen year old body they all remembered.

The burial was cold, rainy, and she was the only one who was shivering for an entirely different reason. Her Jacob was gone, and her eyes stung with tears that would never fall. She knew he was out there somewhere, watching over her (protective even in death, she'd imagine). She knew he would be with her always, two souls forever together, both experiencing a different side of death. 

After everyone else leaves, she walks over and touches the head stone, cold stone-like fingers tracing letters in cold marble. She whispers something, her lips moving fast enough that if there was someone around, they wouldn't be able to understand. She presses a kiss to his name (remembers his fire against her ice) and promises to hold him with her forever; she really has nothing better to do anyways.


End file.
